A Love Letter



Posted: Wednesday, January 30, 2008

by
http://www.freewebs.com/dearbette

I wasn't looking, but I found you. We were both involved with other people when we first met and it was like fate stepped in on our behalf and had them leave us. Neither you or I could understand why they decided to let us go, but as I look back on it now I am so happy they did. Sure, it hurt at first and then it was as if they were mere stepping stones to our finding eachother.

Somehow I think I must have known you'd be the one my heart needed because for the first time, I was afraid of how I felt. You had asked if you could come up the following weekend and without hesitation I had agreed: the kids would be at their dads and I really wanted to find where this was going. While waiting for you, something happened that never had with anyone else: I paced the floor; was very nervous; wondered why you would drive 7 hours just to see me; questioned what the heck was happening to me and demanded from myself why I agreed to this. Shortly before you arrived, near midnight, it dawned on me that for the first time in my life, I was actually in love. That imaginary, faceless person that I saw in my mind all of my life as my perfect match now held the image of you. It totally scared me!

There you are, knocking on my door and I think I did a pretty great job of hiding how I felt. I needed more time to digest this new set of feelings. Sitting on the sofa watching television as we held hands and talked about things, something else started to happen. All the walls of self-defense that had built up during my previous marriage and even earlier datng experiences started to crumble. That scared me even more as they were my security blanket against those that would hurt me. It's as if my inner self knew you, knew that I was finally safe after all the years I believed I didn't think I would be.

I have had a happy life with you. For the past 12 years I have known that I am loved. Not just by anyone, but by the only one that could. I have known a peace that I'd only read about in dime store novels. I've never doubted your love for me, never had a moment where I thought you would be just like all the others and cheat on me. I've only ever felt at home with you, even now when time has brought us to this point of where although we love eachother very much, we rarely sit together on the sofa holding hands. I know you will forever be there for me as I will be for you no matter what.

I love you. Three words that without that certain feeling one gets when they say them, are just three words strung together. We never end a phone call without saying them, we never leave eachothers company without saying them and topping off with a little kiss. I still get goose bumps each time. Sometimes, you pop into my mind and I can't believe how fortunate I am to have this life with you. Not that we have great wealth or possessions, we have something not many have no matter how hard they search for it: Being given the true gift of love by that one person we know could never, would never hurt us; knowing we are eachother's reward for having made it through past realtionships that should have left us cold towards the thought of ever being close enough to someone else to allow for pain.

I know I would be alone without having found you. I know I would not have ever known this happiness without having found you. I know I would have never known what love could be without having found you. I am blessed and rich in all the ways that matter because of you.

I love you WBSdM
Your Wife

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